Recently, he has stopped kissing me on the lips, but we sleep in the same bed and cuddle. He loves me, too, he says, but as a brother/best friend, not as a partner. We were embarrassed, but for the past year we have regularly met and kissed, but he doesn’t go beyond a certain point physically. (He is really good looking but, mysteriously, has been single for many years.) We drank too much and kissed. He is slightly older and also identifies as heterosexual. He offered me a drink and we ended up getting drunk.
We are both architects and I went to see some of his latest work. We were good mates then, but nothing more. One night, after an office dinner party, I went to my colleague’s flat. The dilemma I am a 30-year-old man and I had, until last year, identified as a straight man.